I’m not good, he’s good.

To be honest sometimes I do stop to consider what makes me follow what Jesus says and teaches and for the most part of that thought train, I can’t pin point it. I do things, and say things on a regular basis that goes against what he teaches. I find it too hard to forgive and too easy to run. I find it too hard sometimes to read my bible, but I find it all to easy to read the news. I struggle to treat people the way God does in love, yet I’m all to keen to barate them for how they have acted. I am not good.

Yesterday in Barcelona, I had given a man the rest of my water, as he sat in the sun roasting and likely to pass out. A boy walked passed me and looked at me like I was crazy, be may have believed I was a saint, but I am far from it. I had seen this man pass by me on the beach twice!! In two different places before the most recent encounter. Each time I asked God, what I should do, and feeling frustrated, I walked by, glancing back each time in agony at the man’s condition, but I wasn’t willing to do anything without a prompting. I knew the man was In need, but I didn’t know how I could help him in anyway. In this third encounter at had previously mad a bargain purchase of a 1.5ltr bottle of water for 60 cents (About 45p) I had drunk a quarter of the bottle and put the rest in my bag on the way to the beach. Then pass the sunny train tracks again up by the two beachside hotels, I spotted him, sitting down in literal rags as usual, head dropping and raising as if he was suffering from heatstroke which I might add in 25 degree heat, is acceptable.

He was on his own and people passed him, I too did the same again for the third time, but something stopped me. And this is where I have found my love and respect for Jesus’ love. He in that moment knew in my heart I wanted to help but felt out of ideas, but he still stopped me and asked me if I wanted to go back, he gave ME the choice to do something about it. Something I regularly decline, because of fear. But like many other times I have done this act of ‘kindness’, I accepted, I went back to the man and said: “Hola Senor…agua???” Poor broken spanish but enough was said. I pointed to the water and ushered it towards him to which he accepted. He was suprised I was giving him, kind of asking if I was sure of what I was saying. I was so sure, because I knew even though the sea water was about to create sea crystals in my throat as I swam beachside, he still needed that water more than me, and better yet, I had a way to save myself had I ran out of trouble. I was more of less broke, but I knew I had friends to rely on, he didn’t.

Now what it really showed me in that moment, was that God is good. I was the horrible human in this situation, who so gladly or not so gladly passed by a man who clearly needed aid. I decline the option to help because I felt I had nothing to give.

The trick here is that, I would be inclined to believe I could give when I have, for instance, the water, but that water wasn’t what I gave to that man at all. I gave him love. I have him care, I showed grace and mercy upon him and all because I felt like I wanted too, I felt led to five. But not because I am great. I am not Ghandi, I am not Mother Theresa, I am not Martin Luther King Jr, I am NOT Jesus. But he asks me every single day, and every single opportunity and every single second of the day, he politely and respectfully asks me if I want to participate in his show of love to someone else.

He lovingly asks me, if I would like to cooperate. That in itself, is invaluable. That the creator of this universe, the same being that created me and my heart and is in control of my issues, that same Jesus/God, he asks me if I want to play along. He asks me if I would like to help. He cares about my opinion, he wants to know if I would be willing to help touch his people. I think that, or for better use of words, here in lies the heart of the matter. Here is why I follow, because he loves me and he cares for me, and the same act of generosity would and has been shown to me clearly, on a constant and persistent basis. He doesn’t want to show me any different treatment, other than love, and that…that is amazing.

I am humbled by his words, I am encapsulated by his love, I am a mere mortal, a human being that will one day return to dust, but the originating force behind the creation of my everlasting soul, moves me indefinitely. I am LOVED. I am not good, I did not help that man on my own, I did not make him happy. I have to allow God’s spirit to touch me and use me to do good works, I am NOT good. HE, JESUS CHRIST, is good and that is enough for me to say yes. That’s enough for me to agree every single time. So I do, but not because it makes sense to me, it’s because I love him, and he loves me, and that relationship is perfect between us. It doesn’t always look like it or behave like it from my end, but I could not be more in love with a better person than Jesus Christ. God the father, God the son and God the holy spirt, deserve everything that I have. And I cannot deny that, and that firstly includes my faith, belief, and cooperation.

So I thank Jesus for his loving kindness,and pray that it never disapates from you or I. That he will always be with us,to be the catalyst for change. My prayer is that you will always be able to experience his,in the same way I do. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.

Stay blessed Kingdom Soldiers, General Kwess here.

God is love, Kwesi D.

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